How to Write Your Wedding Vows

So, you are Hawaii Wedding Planning and want to write your Wedding Vows. Yay! Your mind is probably spinning with the endless possibilities of how to create such a meaningful day in your life. As professional wedding officiant I might be biased… however, I think that the officiant and the ceremony are very important parts of the day that are overlooked.

Hawaii wedding planning couple married at Waimea Valley on Oahu.
Hawaii Wedding Location: Waimea Valley
Photo by: Chelsea Stratso

To write or not to write your own wedding vows, that is the question!

When I talk to couples who are planning a wedding in Hawaii, many of them have the question “Should we write our vows?”. I think the answer to this question depends on the kind of people that you are!

I talk to some couples who are nervous to be in front of a crowd of people on their wedding day. Some aren’t stoked about the idea of speaking in front of a bunch of people. People also feel like their vows are personal and don’t want to share in front of a crowd. If this sounds like you, you can have your officiant come with prepared “repeat-after-me” vows. This does not mean that your vows will not be personal to you. The right officiant (like me!) will hop on a call with you. This will ensure that the repeat-after-me vows are true to you as a couple.

If you as a couple aren’t scared of speaking in front of a crowd, then personalizing your vows may be the way to go! This is often times the time during the ceremony when I notice that guests shed the most tears. They get to hear from you why you are choosing to commit to each other.

Hawaii Wedding Planning couple gets married on a beach
Photo by: Bea Becker

Your wedding vows can be outside of the box!

If you are Hawaii Wedding Planning, I also advise couples who I work with to think outside of the box! For example, you don’t have to share your vows in front of your guests. You can take a moment and step away from the crowd. You can also share your personal vows together before or after the ceremony.

I also always love when couples decide to do a bit of both in their ceremony! You can share your personal vows, and then have the officiant lead you through call and response vows afterwards! These options exist whether your wedding is an elopement with just you and your hunni, a more intimate ceremony with a few loved ones, or a larger ceremony with many guests.

Hawaii Wedding Planning couple gets married with an intimate ceremony of 40 people on the North Shore of Oahu
Venue: Ke iki Beach Bungalows

Other vow-related things think about when Hawaii Wedding Planning

Okay, so if you have decided that you do want to write your own vows. There is no right way or wrong way to do it! Here are some things that a I suggest you think about:

  • Think about your journey together and what brought the two of you together
  • What do you love about your partner?
  • What does this commitment to your partner mean to you?
  • What do you want to commit to your partner on your wedding day?
Hawaii Wedding Planning couple elopes on in Maui
Photo by: Chelsea Stratso
Hawaii Wedding Location: Maui

Your Officiant Matters!

The entire ceremony comes together when you have the right officiant. That is where I come into play! If you are planning your Hawaii Wedding, contact me to make your day official! Even if you have a friend or family member officiating your day, reaching out to an officiant can be helpful as they will guide them through a flow of the ceremony.